We All Have to Adapt

It is October, 2020 and we have been back at the house since June 18, 2020. This year has been unbelievably difficult for us as a family. The summer went smoothly, we adapted to the house which was restored after the fire. After 4 months in the apartment we were ready for the move. Dad was able to walk with his walker by the time we were back home. Mom was doing well and the caregiver for Dad helped tremendously when she started the week after we moved into the house. Mom’s caregiver has been with her since Dad broke his hip. My brother and I had been taking care of the parents ourselves since May, 2018 when I arrived to help after retiring from teaching. When Dad fractured his hip on January 4th, I needed additional help.

My brother left on October 9, 2020 but my daughter arrived for a visit the day before. It was great having her here. I was spending my first weekend alone with the parents. Pam came with her Yorkie, Jessie, and drove first to Austin, Texas. She stayed with my brother and his wife then drove to El Paso. She arrived at 6:45 a.m. My brother was still here and I was able to get a room for her at the Sleep Inn. I returned before my parents woke up.

We had a good time and after my brother left the next day I was grateful for her presence. My daughter is Immunocompromised and has to protect herself from Covid. We stayed home most of the time, went to eat at a couple of local restaurants with patio/outside dining. Her Yorkie and I snuggled often and it was a great reunion for mother, grandparents and granddaughter/daughter.

I’m alone with the parents again. We as a family knew this would happen and the doctor told my father and brother (in the doctor’s office) Dad would have to adapt now that brother was leaving. Fortunately Dad’s appointment was later that morning after my daughter arrived. Dad had “graduated” from Palliative Care and his primary doctor wanted to assess his health and well-being. After sharing my concerns it was my brother’s turn to let the doctor know how much more difficult it would be for me to care for both parents. I do not live here. My home is in Nevada, my husband is still working and we have 3 dogs. I miss my husband and would visit twice a month for a couple of days while my brother watched Mom and Dad. The providers are there to help during the day, but at night brother and I took care of them alternating roles.

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About desertturle

Anita Henson aka Winnie. A retired teacher, and caregiver for my loving parents, wife, and mother. Married to Greg "Tex" Henson.
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