Since March 9th, we’ve experienced some
Here is what happened Friday morning
Friday March 20 we went to the house so mom could see it. Dad had a meltdown last night when I told him I wouldn’t take him. It was too late and I was tired so I told him we would go after breakfast.
Mom wanted to see the carpet. She is worried we won’t get the same color carpet when it is replaced. she also wanted to see what color the walls were.
On our way there i get a call which I decided to take because it was a 915 number and it’s usually someone I know. The woman said she wanted to talk to Ramon sanchez and i asked what this was about….she said a referral and i said from whom…she couldn’t say…
I told here what we were doing and wondering if we had a house started to sound fishy to me…..but the trusting soul I am i said we would be on our way back in about 30 min if she wanted to meet at the apt or the house…she had the apartment address and wanted to meet there.
when we finished she met us at the door she started to interview Dad and said she wanted to speak to him alone. I piddled around in the kitchen and they all sounded like normal questions a nurse, palliative, or doc would ask to assess his mental and physical health. Dad was very lucid and could answer all the questions. I finally chimed in when he asked me something he couldn’t remember it was trivial. While is was piddling I was recording the conversation between this person and Dad. I asked if this visit was because I had talked to social services about more help for Mom and Dad. A caregiver from another agency for example that wouldn’t be so expensive.
or meals on wheels because going out was beginning to be a problem with the virus and I don’t have time and energy to do it all…after the discussion which seemed pretty routine she handed the card and we said our goodbyes.
upon seeing the card and after the parents took a break, I asked Daniel what he thought this meant. I had seen a card like this when I was interviewed for possible abuse at a student’s home. I am aware of this….and if she couldnt tell me where the referral came from then it must be someone concerned about Dad’s or Mom’s safety.
I had a talk with Dad and told him I think that someone in the apartment is suspecting us of elder abuse. He quickly rejected the idea and I told him it’s probably because of his “meltdowns” didn’t call it that and the arguments that ensued. I raise my voice Daniel raises his voice and if the front door isn’t shut tight (we did an experiment) our voices carry to the entry way. When he has one of these episodes he holds his head in his hands and asks why are you doing this or why won’t you let me do what I want…It has to be the neighbor across from us because after one of our loud discussions she knocked on our door Thursday asking if a package had been left. Her name is Claudia and she is a teacher at a catholic school..she has been home because of spring break and extended school closure.
On Sunday Dad asked me why I was mad at him and I told him I wasn’t. I told him I was controlling my conversations as not to start an argument and choosing my words carefully…..
Now everything is better…he is calmer thinks twice about having a meltdown and we are happier so far. But it is still worrisome that someone had to come to the apartment. She said she would refer several agencies for more help
center for the aging..possible programs for long term care etc. I am wondering if it might have come from social services
remember i was calling all kinds of places for help after the fire and it might just be that….Red Cross meals on wheels social services at WellMed every nurse and doctor we saw….maybe it’s a result of all that and the worry I had for their well-being. I just don’t know.
N try After it was all over she left the card